“Do you have the patience to wait until your mud settles and the water is clear?”
― Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching
- Have you ever been so swept up in the heat of the moment that your emotional outburst made things worse?
- Have you ever wished you had just waited a bit or ‘slept on it’ before you reacted?
We’ve all had these moments, I’m sure.
It’s that hostile e-mail from a client, that disruptive request from a friend or relative that caught you off-guard or the ‘pop-up’ abrasive guest at a dinner party that set your fireworks off.
Stirring Up the Mud
When you’ve got your knickers in a knot over something, the best thing you can do (because, obviously, your buttons are being pushed for a reason) is to take a time out to reflect on it.
- Why are you being emotionally triggered?
- Is it something you can alchemize (read more about that here: 3 Ways to Alchemize Chaos) — which simply means transmute (can you dowse the flame)?
- Is burning that flame necessary or is it something you can let go of?
- Is this a battle worthy of your energy or can you let this one go (i.e. choose the battles your fight)?
- Do you have to be right or can you simply be the still presence without reacting?
- Can you say what you need to say, be impeccable with your word and then let it go — whatever the outcome?
- If you can sense a situation heating up, can you send out calming energy? Give it a try — it can really work.
If you’re in a situation where you can’t simply say, ‘let me get back to you‘ — or where you can leave replying to a text message or e-mail until the morning, when you have had time to calm down and reflect — simply say or do nothing. Try and sneak a ‘time-out’ by excusing yourself to go powder the old noggin, so you can take a few deep breaths and regroup.
The moment your levers are being pulled and temperature is rising, this is your indicator that you are out of balance. Sometimes they are even old, outworn emotional reactions that no longer serve any purpose. Always question why you are reacting and ask HQ (your higher self) for some guidance and clarity if you are at a loss. Read related article: How to Communicate Instantly with Your Higher Self for Speedy Manifesting
Letting the Water Clear
Never react to something when you are in a heightened emotional state. Even if you think your wording is sound and diplomatic, your energy will come through and it will be perceived in the emotional state you’re in.
I’ve had countless experiences where I have written a perfectly straight-forward e-mail but have been in a raging temper and the recipient has picked up on the hostility even though the words were PC. I now know never to write in any kind of altered emotional state — I only respond when I am in a place of balance and calm.
The situations I have dealt with in a calm state of balance have turned out well. It also helps exponentially when you can visualize the outcome you desire. Practice holding that vision every time you slip into worry about something (always clearly see the desired outcome).
Patience, in these matters, can truly temper a volatile situation.
When ‘the water clears’ you will be able to see the situation from more than your emotional reactive state. You can glean different perspectives which will give you a more transparent picture of how to handle the situation. Always speak from your place of truth and integrity.
It is perfectly fine for you to take your time over giving an answer or reacting to a situation. Don’t let others pressurize your cooker into exploding.
Other articles you may enjoy:
Dissolving Chaos (Especially in Lunar Energy)
How to Avoid Quantitative Action Dissatisfaction
Using Your Heart to Beat the Matrix
Cherie Roe Dirksen is a self-empowerment author, multi-media artist and musician from South Africa.
To date, she has published 3 self-help and motivational books and brings out weekly inspirational blogs at her site www.cherieroedirksen.com. Get stuck into finding your passion, purpose and joy by downloading some of those books gratis when you click HERE.
Her ambition is to help you to connect with your innate gift of creativity and living the life you came here to experience by taking responsibility for your actions and becoming the co-creator of your reality. You can follow Cherie on Facebook (The Art of Empowerment — for article updates). She has an official art Facebookpage (Cherie Roe Dirksen – for new art updates). You can also check out her Facebook band page at Templeton Universe.
Cherie posts a new article on CLN every Thursday. To view her articles, click HERE.
This article (Why Patience Truly is a Virtue) was originally written for and published byConscious Life News and is published here under a Creative Commons license with attribution to the author Cherie Roe Dirksen
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Great to connect with you! I don’t think I’ve written to you, if I have I humbly apologise.
I’m Jo – artist, writer, traveller (I was interviewed by local radio on that subject), mental health advocate, music lover, wild west nut intrigued by science, and renaissance soul with a potty sense of humour.
Four years ago I began a three-year journey towards miraculous full recovery after thirty years of depression – a medication crisis was the catalyst, I’ve never felt this good – and I’m chronicling the rebuild of my polymath, adventurous and creative lifestyle on my blog, *Creating My Odyssey *
I’m networking with creatives with mental health issues and reaching people with a voice, and those with depression in particular, to show that depression is the most treatable of mental illnesses.
By enormous good chance through my medication crisis and wonderful neighbours, we met the brilliant mental health team, who, with a combination of medication (known as California Rocket Fuel – love it!) and cognitive behavioural therapy, brought me to where I am now. Which proves that provided sufferers know where to look, help is available. That’s the hard part, which shouldn’t be the case.
*Creating My Odyssey * is a great vehicle for my creativity – writing (anecdotal articles and an epic novel) and art – and also covers a myriad of eclectic subjects. I’m unleashing everything that was previously hidden under a bushel, and I’ve been interviewed and had articles published on mental health sites.
I’m also posting blog links on my site and would love to exchange links and guest posts with other bloggers, particularly on mental health matters, so if you’re interested, I’d love to hear from you. Also, if possible, to collaborate with other creatives who suffer or have suffered from mental health problems. Possibly exchange blog posts about creative lives, whatever ideas anyone may have. I’m open to (almost!) anything! I should also add that my artwork is very much for sale if you’re interested.
I’ve also been writing a humongous novel forever, on and off, particularly during young parenthood and depression, to help keep me sane*. Alias Jeannie Delaney *is the life story of a devastating cowgirl who’s the fastest gun in the west and also bisexual. Since my recovery from depression I’ve decided it’s time to get it out there! I’m blogging about it on my site. I’ve had interviews about my fascination for the wild west, and even appeared on a news item on southern UK television!
Thank you so much for reading, and I’d love you to follow me on my travels through life.
I’ve had an interview published here: Leslie Tate interview/Recovering From Depression Part 1 Leslie Tate interview/Recovering From Depression Part 2
I’ve had mental health articles published here: Councillors Cafe – All Dried Up Councillors Cafe – My Experience of CBT Rachel Kelly/My wellness story by Jo Clutton Creative Mental Health – One of the Hardest Things iam1in4/ creating-my-odyssey Author Jo Clutton – Mental Movement Lifelightsmag – Who Are You and What Have You Done With
My Wife? Debra Eve – (Late Bloomers) More Proof It’s Never Too Late
I had many anecdotal articles published in the *Alton Gazette (Hampshire UK)* I was featured in my cowgirl role in the *Alton Gazette* and *The Sunday Telegraph Magazine*! I had an article on narrow boating featured in Waterways World
I write about life, creativity and mental health here: http://www.jo-b-creative.blogspot.co.uk I go west here: Kitty Le Roy’s Wild West I talk to mates and share here: Facebook Jo Bennett I share my posts here: Facebook Creating My Odyssey I jaw with western folks here: Facebook Kitty Le Roy’s Wild West Saloon I tweet here: Twitter Jo Clutton I post some of my umpteen zillion photos here: Instagram JMClutton I find interesting folk to exchange notes with here: Linkedin Jo Clutton I pin loads of images here: Pinterest