Lost in a Forest of Doubt
“Trees are amazing life forms as they are grounded and rooted to the earth yet their branches are always caressing the sky — the ultimate metaphor for balance (as above so below, as within so without).”
At the beginning of last week, I found myself in a bit of a funk.
Not only did I have a bout of the despair demons but I also found myself lost in doubt — I just couldn’t see the forest for the trees.
- What am I doing?
- Why am I doing it?
- Is any of this actually helping me or anyone else?
- How am I going to make my rent this month?
Yup, the usual stuff that throws you a curve ball when you least expect it.
That night, I went to bed feeling rather low. I woke up the next morning feeling the same. I sat on my sofa staring at the wall, unwillingly thinking I should just pack it all in and go get a ‘proper’ job. Oh, woe is me!
How can I carry on offering ‘self help’ and creative advice when I am in a quagmire? My mind was tripping out on this dichotomous conundrum.
Of course, this just made me feel worse and less worthy to carry on with the site.
Who’s Only a 100% Organic Human Then?
We’re all human at the end of the day (note to self and any others out there who think they need the ‘stiff upper lip’ approach all the time!).
Swallowing My Own Pills
Looking back on some of my articles, I decided to take my own advice and go be in nature. After all, I had to prove to myself that I wasn’t talking out of my own ass with the advice I dish out.
So off I went to take a walk on the beach.
Sea Breeze and Water Underfoot
“Come forth into the light of things, let nature be your teacher.” — William Wordsworth
Holy Carumba! Within 30 minutes I had not only got some decent walking in and some good time to think but I had also done breathing exercises and a bit of gratitude meditation too — I was feeling a lot better.
After all of this, I sat on the sand looking out at the ocean and the beautiful blue sky. What a paradise! I started to chuckle to myself. This was definitely working.
I could feel that depression had completely left me and I was sitting in appreciation.
Get Your Kit Out!
I rushed back to my studio to begin work on some paintings that I saw in a vision whilst I was meditating.
This picture at the top of this blog, which I have called ‘The Forest Time Forgot’ (and, yes, I am shamelessly promoting it here in order to sustain my livelihood — click on the picture to take you to the poster shop, if you fancy this adorning your wall) started out as a form of colour therapy for me while I was mindlessly doodling the background into existence.
I stuck to Pthalo blues and Emerald greens which are very holistically calming and balancing colours.
I was listening to classical music whilst painting this which I think comes through in the sweeping motion of the cosmic sky.
I beg you to listen to ‘The Aquarium’ by Saint-Saens (below) to truly get the gist of this picture (I have compiled an audio-visual video so you can listen and view the picture at the same time).
This song cropped up on my playlist when I was busy at work and it just fitted so much with the overall feel of this piece.
Branch Codes and Cosmic Undertones
With all that in mind, ‘The Forest Time Forgot’ has a feel of whimsical calmness and universal wonder to it. The trees seem to have taken on a life of their own with ‘facial expressions’ that were not intentional.
Trees are amazing life forms as they are grounded and rooted to the earth yet their branches are always caressing the sky — the ultimate metaphor for balance (as above so below, as within so without).
What do you get/feel/see when you look at this picture?
I was feeling really ‘child-like’ when I painted it. Very adventurous, playful and serene. Does that come across?
Naturally Tried and Tested
So, seriously now, when you find yourself in a funk/void/chasm of doom — get yourself out into nature. I did such a quick turnaround when I decided to take some time out at the seaside — the transformation was just so quick!
The creative surges came through thick, fast and furious. So much so that I managed to pop out 3 paintings this week in 2 days. All the pictures in this blog are the after effects of the beach outing.
Proof that a bit of Gaia therapy works.
Try a bit of the great outdoors next time you feel the demons of despair pounding away at your door.
“The mountains are calling and I must go.” — John Muir
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