Letting Go For Your Own Good — Detaching Out Of Love

Bluebird

What is Detachment?

Detachment is letting go of worldly dramas and living in true peace.

To still be able to love your ‘neighbour’ unconditionally but to not get involved in any kind of drama whatsoever.

Every emotion you experience in this life is a choice.  As soon as you feel resistance to someone or something or a pull to engage in conflict, you have re-entered the world of drama.

How can I truly Detach?

There are two different types of detachment, that I know of.

1.  Detaching with Love

white poppyWhen you detach with love you have a feeling of being in exquisite peace with the world.  You bear NO resentment, anger or aggression to anyone or anything.  You are in a state of allowing and you are working with your heart centre.

“To detach with love means that you are in the understanding that there is always more than meets the eye to any given situation.”

When you work with your heart centre you see the divine in everyone and everything.  You can see past the ‘drama’ of circumstances and situations.  You can see right to the very core of conflict and feel compassion, even for those whose opinions and actions differ from yours severely.

To detach with love means that you are in the understanding that there is always more than meets the eye to any given situation.

“Never assume to know the ins and outs of another souls journey.”

You are only observing a surface reality to a much deeper library of events that have led up to this scenario.  ‘Scenario’ in this case could be a life situation or even a certain person.  You see, we have no clue as to another souls journey, you can make assumptions and piece certain bits of information together, but, ultimately, you are not seeing the entire multi-layered picture.

Never assume to know the ins and outs of another souls journey.  This must be respected and a person who is truly detached in love, knows this and let’s it be.  Even if this soul is someone very close to you.  Every soul that incarnates here has their own life lessons to learn in their own chosen way.

We all come into this life with freewill and the ability to choose what we want to experience, even if this means we make the wrong choices.  Sometimes this has to happen for you to learn and grow.

Some people don’t learn their lessons in time but you have to respect that souls journey and choices.  You are not responsible for any adult human being but yourself, all you can offer is your unconditional love (even if it is from afar) and your support when it is needed.

Judgment is never wise, always try to find the compassion in any situation.

2. Detaching out of Fear

The other form of detachment is that of letting go out of exhasperation.

You feel cornered and frustrated, so your reflex is to detach to protect yourself from further hurt.  This must not be mistaken for detaching out of love, which is heart centred. Detaching out of fear is a lower chakra energy.

“Going within is not easy but nothing of true importance ever really is.”

You may even be experiencing negative lower chakra symptoms such as constipation (not being able to let go) or stomach upsets (solar plexus signal of anxiety/worry).

If you feel that you are detaching out of fear, then it is best to go into it.  Give yourself some space and time to meditate.  See meditation blog HERE.

The worst thing you can do is carry on and sweep whatever is bothering you under the rug.  Going within is not easy but nothing of true importance ever really is.  You need to do this inner work to truly gain closure for yourself.  Without this closure you will not be ready to move on to the next stage of development.

Forgive

BeachedA lot of the time, people tend to hang on to their past hurts.  This is not self-serving.  To forgive another for something will not only affect that person positively (and if you don’t want them to be affected positively, this is another sign that you need to see the divine in others to be able to detach with love) but it will liberate you.

I have devoted a whole chapter in my book ‘Divine You — Redefining Love in the New Earth’ to forgiveness.  If you are having trouble with letting go then I suggest you read it.

Trust

So if you feel that you are clinging onto something or someone, isn’t it about time to let it go?

Trust that the Universe will cushion your fall into the void of unconditional love.  You are the only one responsible for holding yourself back.

What are you still holding on to that you cannot let go of?  

Are you able to see how detaching with love could be a viable solution?

Do you feel that you may be detaching out of fear?

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CAUTION: God’s Gonna Kick Your Ass!

The Prodigal Son

We all know the biblical parable of the Prodigal Son (if you don’t click here).

Long story really short:  Two sons are given their inheritance before the father dies.  One son does the ‘right’ thing and works for his father, the other son squanders his lot and comes crawling back to the father.  The father takes him in as if nothing has happened and celebrates (much to the discontent of the other brother who feels it isn’t fair).

Well, is that fair?

I think so…

God’s Gift of Freewill

This is a great analogy for God.  I don’t think God’s going to punish anybody for taking a detour on the path, or even if you completely stray off this path.

“I don’t think God is going to kick anyone’s butt in heaven for missed opportunity or bad behaviour.”

God gives all of us many gifts, whether they be in the form of talents, love or friendships, etc.  What we do with them is up to us but I don’t think He is going to be upset if we don’t use them.

I don’t think God is going to kick anyone’s butt in heaven for missed opportunity or bad behaviour.  God gave us freewill and this is the one gift we do use whether it is deemed ‘good’ or ‘bad’.

“Our choice is our gift to ourselves, we bring to our own table that which we experience.  “

We have this blessed gift of choice.  We will be our own judges and our misgivings will be our remorses.  God is that parent who does not judge, only accepts what is.

Please read my blog Does God Love Us Unconditionally? HERE

Choices

Our choice is our gift to ourselves, we bring to our own table that which we experience.

Nobody can tell you what to do but you can take advice.

My advice is this:  Take responsibility for your life.  If you feel you are in alignment with your integrity then that is great!  Whether someone else is not in alignment and you notice this, it is none of your business unless you are asked by that person for help.

You should not judge them for the path they are taking.  You don’t know where that path may inevitably lead them.  That is why you should not interfere.  If you are asked for assistance by them, then that soul has made a choice.  That is why you may help when you are asked to help.

Take Responsibility

In taking responsibility for your life, as in the honourable son from the Prodigal Son parable, you are not being a burden on anyone else.  This feels like the noble thing to do, doesn’t it?

“We need to stop comparing ourselves to others and focus purely on how harmonized we are with our purpose.”

It doesn’t really matter if your sibling is doing the opposite to you in their life and your parent still welcomes them back with open arms.  The father in this parable was right and his son should have rather rejoiced to have his brother back instead of feeling hard done by because all his efforts weren’t rewarded.  I think his reward far outweighs the ‘lost’ son in that he got to spend more valuable time with his father.  The other brother may regret this for the rest of his life.

We need to stop comparing ourselves to others and focus purely on how harmonized we are with our purpose.  Replace judgment with compassion and understanding.

Have you ever felt resentment?  Are you still feeling that way?  Can you perhaps choose to see things differently now?

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Your World, Your Life

I would like to share with you the outro of my book (‘Divine You’).  It is a poem I wrote just before I started the endeavour that was the undertaking of writing this self-empowerment guide.  It encapsulates the journey of this book and I hope it will whet your appetite.

So for now, I’ll leave you with this…

Your World, Your Life…

Your world begins and ends with you
You are in control, the master of your destiny

You are the constant observer of your world
You are the choice maker
Your choices create your world

You will know the crossroads when you see them
Think hard about who you are and what you want
Your decisions are never wrong unless you don’t learn from them
And are grateful when they are the right decisions

We make mistakes so we can learn
We have to make mistakes so we know what we want from life
It is never too late to alter your destiny or to right a wrong

Forgiveness is vital along your path
To forgive helps you to extinguish anger
It is not designed to indemnify the perpetrator
It is there to help you move on

To forgive yourself is a difficult task
It is also a most vital task

You were made perfect
You doubt yourself through the eyes and opinions of others
Be mindful of what you say to others and what is said to you

You know you are Divine, you know you are perfect
Compliments or criticisms from others should be taken lightly
Only you know your soul
Only you can evaluate yourself

If you let criticism into your heart you are agreeing with it
You will pick up a lot of this kind of ‘baggage’ along the way
Just remember it is easy to break the agreement if you do not concur

Only you know who you are
Only you can make the agreement

Never assume anything, assumptions only cause confusion
Make sure you know the facts

The world is your oyster, you are never to young or too old
Your dreams will become reality if you believe it
Thoughts are the second most powerful force in the Universe
Love is the first

Love yourself and you will have endless love for others
Hold love in your heart and the world will open up for you
See everyone in the world as a part of you, a collective Oneness
Treat them like you would treat yourself

Love begets love, fear begets fear
Again, the choice is yours

This is it

Choose

                                                      ~  Cherie Roe Dirksen

 

My book ‘Divine You — Redefining Love in the New Earth’ is now available at Barnes & Noble Bookstore.

This book encourages the reader to re-examine some fundamental qualities to living a happy and content life.  It looks at the importance of forgiveness, why it is imperative not to judge, how to use the Law of Attraction, present moment awareness, what unconditional love really looks like, how to vanquish fear, awakening the unity that is the christ-consciousness seed within you and lots more.

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